tall Girls Song!!!!!!
No, im saying at one time you had a good life. a wife, kid, nice place to live, and a profession. and you lost everything. now i see why you are miserable. you had a good life.

Lobsang, here is a story that a friend sent me when I was going through some difficult times: "Jacob looked down at his path as if it were the current of a great river. As he stared into the flow he saw the seemingly unending line of moments given to him. Then, like a man marking a trail, he began to put his prayer between the moments, making the common profound by pausing. Using prayer to tie knots in time, Jacob isolated the details that would pass before others as a stream of events. In this way Jacob secured the moments in his life, returned their individuality, allowed the luster in each of them to be observed, and, appreciated and saved, transformed his moments into a string of pearls." -- from Jacob's Journey by Noan benShea

I have decided to explode my rectum with gunpowder.
If you have ever heard the term "blasted a$$". Like people would say "he is a blasted a$$". Well the term come from back in the old slavery times. White people would get a black person and pack their rectum with gun powder. Then they would stick in a fuse and blow up their rectum. This was called "blasting a black's a$$". Well I have been thinking as you know of how to punish my self as well as die. I think I might do this. All I shall need is gunpowder and a fuse.